You and your spouse may not have the same parenting style, and that’s something you may want to be concerned with if you’re going through a divorce. Both parents should do their best to agree on a single parenting style, rules for punishments or rewards and other factors involving raising their children. If they don’t, then there is a greater likelihood of having a conflict (or multiple conflicts) as the child grows.

Parenting styles generally fall into four categories. These four styles are called:

  • Authoritarian
  • Permissive
  • Uninvolved
  • Authoritative

Of those four, authoritative parents are the most likely to raise children who become responsible adults who are comfortable with expressing their feelings and opinions. Before you know if that describes you, you need to learn more about each style.

Authoritarian parents are much like dictators. They place the rules and expect children to follow them. They enforce rules with strict consequences.

Permissive parents are almost the opposite. They allow the children to almost anything they want, even allowing their children to break rules. Consequences are rarely given.

Uninvolved parents are simply that: Uninvolved. They may be there physically but let their children run the household. These parents don’t talk about school or homework with their kids. They don’t spend much time with them, either.

Finally, there is the authoritative parent. This is a parent who sets rules and guidelines that are reasonable. They communicate with their children and participate in their lives. Most people want to be this kind of parent, and it is the healthiest for your child or children.

You and your ex-spouse can work together to set guidelines and enforce them within the same terms, so your child grows up knowing structure but doesn’t have to meet two different parenting goals.